PROMENADE!!!
oh my gosh...

I LOVED MY PROM...

I labit.

Me and my mom planned to go to the salon at 4 and we did arrive there, after a hellish kind of traffic. This guy named Leo was the head of my beauty switch. He was trying to finish this girl who was before me and she was so prissy and maarte it killed me. She took 2 and a half hours. In other words, i got finished at like 6. I was supposed to meet Nick (my gorgeous prom date) at 5.30....EEK!

So me and my mom rushed over to our church where we were supposed to meet up. HE WAS ALREADY THERE! (duh. a gentleman is never late) He was dashing by the way.So anyways I told him to wait for like 10 minutes for me to wear my dress. After many make up re-do's and putting on my wonderful dress (which was very stressful) I was ready and boy was I gorgeous. HAHA. Nick was surprised at how I looked. I look like crap at church. Haha, he said it was a new side to Camille. My parents took one last picture and we were off. Me and Nick found it surprisingly easy to talk with one another. He gave me a corsage and he had trouble with it. Which was kinda cute. We had some small talk about how he was SHOCKED that I asked him and we made it to the hotel in no time. Needless to say, even though we were late, we were early. There were so few people there at that time and me and Nick got our pictures taken and registered. After that we decided to look around the mall. We decided to chit chat at the swimming pool for like 20 minutes. Which was nice because I kinda miss that. We were talking about soccer and school and stuff like that. I really liked that we were comfortable.

At like 7:30 we went down just to see if the party had started. IT HADNT. But when we stayed for like a minute or two they made us go inside. We were the first people in our table (our table had, briggy, rene, rina, jayjay and dates). Me and nick had a fun time taking pictures and chatting. We commented on the music and food. I told him all about school and its not so happy stuff. We hated Dalandan soda. HAHA. OOPS.

Me and Nick stayed and then went to the bathroom, came back. After the awardings (congrats mindy!) we had the dance. We headed out to the danc efloor but we wanted a slow dance and there was NONE. Pure hip-hop crap. So anyways we decided to trail Rina and her date Serge and ended up chatting once more near the poolside. We talked a bit and made a story about the guy that was opposite us. He made a story about his cigarettes and being mad at his girlfriend thus bringing him up there. I made a story about him proposing with the ring box and he was contemplating on how to say it then out of no where his date or girlfriend arrives. Yahee...im good.

So anyways we headed downstairs once again and we got out prizes and free stuff. We then headed out and wanted to go to Robinsons Galleria. Unfortunately the guard said it was closed so we just decided to get some coffee. We asked the driver and he said that MetroWalk was still open. We completely forgot. Anyways we came there and the people were staring at us since we were in complete formal attire. The barista even asked about my school and Nick's school. We had a funny moment cuz Nick didnt get his Vanilla frap cuz the barista only ordered one. When nick asked for a lollipop and the barista said "how sweet!", then he gave it to me. HAHA. The barista didnt get the point in ordering 2 fraps. So we looked at the receipt and then started laughing because it was only 1 frap and we waited for so long.

After lining up again and getting the frap. Nick told me a while earlier about this place which was full of erotic stuff and so we went over there. SO MANY PEOPLE WERE LOOKING. Nick liked the attention though. WAHA. So we went over and there it was. We pretended to pass by but we were laughing sooo hard. It was full of gross stuff. WAHA. We then saw that there was an arcade there for shooting hoops, a rodeo thing, ring play, test your strength thing. It was in public which ws fun. The people would show off their skills which was really great.

I dared nick to take a picture of PLEASURE PLACE. which he did. WAHA. It was so dripping with sin. GROSS.

We stayed and watched a bit then proceeded to go back to the car. I felt a bit more comfortable walking back because I though no people were looking. But when I turned around everyone was looking. OH FREAKY.

HAHA. It was the best that night. We went home in his car and talked some more.He brought me home and my dad thanked him. I asked him if he enjoyed last night. And he did. I enjoyed it definitely. Im actually having a prom hangover. THE BEST EVER! I would do it again anyday. Your the best nick! :)

Camille

Camille

Labels: camille, fun, nick, prom, promenade

haaay...
At times I feel like I cant release all of me onto the world. Not that I want to change the world in any way but I feel like I want to show the true me. Im so mad at posers but in truth im one myself. I dont say what I really want to say and I dont act the way I want to act. I keep on thinking "what's going to happen if i do this?" or "what will they think?". I think its pretty shallow of people doing stuff that show themselves as higher beiongs in the world. The way they think, speak and act shows how they present themselves. I always observe people around me and I know the truth. I want to tell someone who can finally understand but I know that if I tell, they might think about it as the "views of another angsty teenage girl who hates everyone" thing. So here I go again thinking of what people might think about me. Its pretty sick how the world turns out to be.I guess I sound angry but im just sad.

Im sad because i havent turned out as I want to be. If i count all the "I"'s in this entry it would be a lot. Im sad because I keep on thinking about myself. I want to think about others, how i can help, how i can be a blessing in a way. I just dont want to feel this sad about the world or myself. At times i dont even know what my "true" self really means anymore because its just so twisted i cant keep my facts straight. Well, teenage angst...haha

quiz....

Rain expresses your feelings like nothing else can.

In the rain no one can see the tears that

fall down your face.


What weather represents your feelings?
brought to you by Quizilla


Hey, what are you looking at...


Do you want to see pictures of FAT cats! (The pics will make you laugh so hard!)
brought to you by Quizilla


You are weed. youre laid back and you like relaxing

with your friends, laughing, and mellowing

out.


What drug are you?
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tshirt

yourz is "Sarcasm its only one of the services

i offer" get out there and show it off


Which Kick Ass Shirt Saying Are You??
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The power of Darkness. You are very sad/ depressed.

You spend most of your days crying. And

sometimes you easaly hurt other peoples

feelings.


- What is your strongest Power?- ( 20 detailed results, beautiful anime pics, for Guys and girls)
brought to you by Quizilla



You represent sadness. Whether you're naturally

sensitive, or have been traumistized in

someway, you appear (and may be) emotionally

scarred. You have a delicate soul, and are

understanding of those around you. Always

remember that no matter how lost you feel,

someone is always looking out for you.


What Emotion do you Represent? (with gorgeous anime pictures!)
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MOSTLY INSANE!
Most of the time you are insane but there are those

time you do have a normal moment. Just

remember that there is no such thing as

normal. Keep laughing. Though you may want to

stop talking to yourself.


What Is your instanity level?
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15...You Get This One!






MSN Avatars! (15 Different Avatars To Get!)
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etc

You are at one with the world, you should get

Brandon and Jose's Buddah-inspired fish

tattoo.


Which Incubus Tattoo Should You Get?
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quiz.
">
Brandon Boyd singer <33333


Who From Incubus are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

quiz...

You're Jack! "I am the Pumpkin King!" and

yes you are. Although you have the fame and

fortune, you are not happy. You go and try to

find yourself but in cost of Christmas. In

the end everything is peachy keen and we

still love you.


Which Nightmare Before Christmas Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

another tragedy in history
oh my god..

i opened the tv this morning and we were just watching cartoons (my bro's and I) then all of a sudden i see ABS-CBN reporting about the death of people from a stampede. Make no mistake this is a regular thing in the world normally only 1 person dies but today....it was 60!

I watched in horror as about 15 ambulances were in the middle of crowds and their in the middle was a pile of corpses on trhe road near ULTRA.

ULTRA is near my church and every sunday we pass it and today i was horrifed seeing the bodies just on the road covered with banigs and newapapers. I am so sad...so sad. Tommorow i will pass by a spot where corpses lay today. I was about to cry but no tears came. I saw people weeping over the dead. Police trying to control the people. About 100 rescue peopele helping out. Ambulances blaring their signals.

Guess why there was a stampede.

It nwas because of the show called "Wowowee". I hate that show. Its a typical noontime show that every normal Filipino loves and today was their anniversary. People have been camping out near ULTRA for 3 days now. They opened their gates then wham! people became overexcited and all hell came loose. They all wanted to get in. Naturally some slip and fall because they find their being carried by the crowd not walking anymore. Then they fall down and get stepped on by hundreds of people. Their backs, hearts, lungs, organs get crushed all at the same time. People cant stop becaus ethe crowd is pressing on.

60 people died today just because of a stupid gameshow. A result of everyones excitement and selfishness. Now everyone is affected. Families grieving, children who are lost. People who come from the provinces might be even mad because they came all this way for nothing.

STOP.

People died today. Isnt that enough.

Willie Revillame was crying on tv today. His face wasnt shown but he was on the phone. I dont like Willie. He is some rapist bastard who makes people answer "1+1" questions. BUT He was weeping because of the dead. I wish the others would take time to weep too.

OH by the way its now 61

I feel so sad..Take time to weep.

Daniel.
Last year was like major crap...imagine going through all those pains and troubles and only being 13! I felt really unlucky. Its just that i felt new things that i've never felt before like pain and suffering, anger and hate. I was forced to grow up in so many ways.

Im 14 now and i feel OLD. haha. I realize things now. I have grown up a lot. Maybe realized my mistakes, maybe not. I didnt like my 13th year because i had my realizations in life because of my cousins, like, family, etc.

My cousin is soon leaving. Just thinking about it gives me pain. Not outside pain which goes away but a pain that gets stronger as each second passes by. He has been one of my best friends as i now realize, a true person to lean on in times of trouble. He was like a shining light in my dark days, always there to make me laugh when i felt like i was drowning in pain. He has such a passion for everything around him and he radiates in everything that he does. I admire him a lot since i was little. I realize that i have always wanted to be like him. Do acting with him, sing like him. The only thing talent that he had that i couldnt do was his drawing. I will never be good in art but i love art. See? my internal structure is built like him.

I am now grown up. I decided to follow my own path. I am discovering my passions but i will always know that he will be there for me. He loves me very much, knows me best. Knows when im sad or angry or happy. He knows me. Im sad, angry, depressed, every single sad emotion is in me when i think that nhe is going to leave for college and start his new life. I love him a lot. I have always kind of relied on him on all these days.

I kind of wish that i wasnt that close to him so that i wouldnt feel this pain but i am fortunate to have known him at all. He is my cousin and my confidant. My mentor, counselor and best friend.
I will let him go. I told him i would. I will be brave enough to step down on that airport and cry as little as possible as he leaves. Guess im being over dramatic. But im being me. I will always miss him. He matters so much. I know that in this last window of time we have together we have to spend as much time together but face the impending truth of time. Time is such a punishment. I wish to cry with him at least together before he goes. It means much.

Grabe this is so dramatic. Bottomline is that im going to miss him.

...
my pulse quickening

me heart beating

tears flowing

soul bleeding

how trapped i am in this box

my fists are bruised

my voice is gone

my hair disheveled

my happiness gone

tears flow

tears flow

one at a time

i feel something new

it makes me alive

adrenaline coursing through my veins

is it hope

is it fear

it is anger

consuming my all

no one came

no one came

i am trapped

no one came

no one came

i am left alone

me, myself and i

lolo...
on my way to my cousins play i was in the taxi with my mom, lola, brother and LOLO...Personally i love lolo very much but when i stepped into the taxi he was already talking to the taxi driver about God... he was sharing the word and forcing the guy to accept...he even made the driver repeat what to say...man was it uncomfortable...he even thought the guy accepted the word na and told him what to do now that he has accepted...stuff like that...it was so weird feeling...i guess the driver thought my lolo was insane because he was laughing a bit...

I dunno but the question for myself is...should i be uncomfortable? shouldnt i be burdened to do that too?


The play of my cousin Daniel was the best! i love him...he played some con artist stealing the property and wife of this guy by acting like a religious person...haha it was so funny...he looke demonic and scary...my cousin is a very good actor...he was way better than the other actors...only one other was as good as him...i dont doubt his ability to be in Broadway someday...

I actually wanted to be like him when i was little and i guess i got influenced... I love to act and am love to critique movies and actors...He loves anything to do with the French, may it be the dust to the music...he loves art and of course Paris which he has alresy BEEN to..."someday we wil go there", he told me...I too wanna kiss the ground of Paris...I guess i got influenced...

Since i grew up with all of my cousins male i got influenced by all of them...NO i am not a tomboy...OR a LESBIAN...i am a serious female and normal dont get me wrong...I have always idolized my cousins since i was small..i looked up to their spit wars, potato flying escapades, exploring adventures...I loved them...I practically worshipped them... haha... Kuya Natahn and Josiah influenced me on their craziness... Joel influenced me on the guitar...Daniel in the arts and Ian on the music...I love them...

I guess i have always been lucky...i have always been normal around guys...I know some people who are afraid of the opposite gender...haha...I know tons of guys...no im not bragging...i just cant get the fact that girls think that guys are just disgusting perverts and jerks when they are really wrong...sometimes its better to have guy friends because they dont make a fuss about everything...no im not insulting girls...im just stating to girls that RESPECT guys dont go drooling over them just because they look good...look into his personality first...:)
guess this goes to all my guy friends out there...

dont pull away...
As I held your hand it felt warm

You and I held hands

It was for a moment

Then you pulled away

I felt cold

I miss you

You mean a lot to me

You have no idea

I love you

Its cheesy

But its true

I care

I really do

Do you care for me

Why did you pull away

Come back to me

Please

So many questions

Not yet answered

Im drowning

In a bottle of depression

You are my light

In my darkness

Am I saying this

Do you know this

Are you reading this

I care for you

Youre leaving me

I can see you pulling away

Tears fill my eyes

Goodbye

As she sat on the grass she breathed in the aroma of the earth and grass mixed together. She loved its smell. It was the feel of the earth, hard and firm. While the soft blades of green grass cushioned her whole body like a bed fit for a king. Lying on her stomach she looked over the horizon and watched the ever busy, bright lighted metropolis move so quickly. She wondered how different where she stood was from the smoggy metropolis. She decided that she would rather lie on the grass all day than be in the polluted metropolis. It was nighttime then and she felt an overwhelming gladness as she looked into the distance. As she turned on the radio she felt the mood of the wind. She felt the earth, the grass, the trees, the flowers, the moonlight, the clouds, everything. She felt it all at once. A hand tapped her shoulder. She turned around and smiled. She stood up and looked into his face, she could see it. He knew the earth, wind and sky. Then they danced the night away

another story by me...

for my friend...
My Friend...

I dont now why i feel this way. I believe that realisations are a bad omen. I know that
someday you will leave me here and I dont know if i will be able to cope up with that. I feel
as if you were to leave it will be the end of my world. Do you think its right to be even liking
you? Should I? Do I?

Is it selfishness for not wanting you to leave? is it care? What would you feel? How do you
feel about me? Should i know? Will i know? I dont understand this, ive known you for so
long and its only NOW when all things end, that i have realisations.

Will i ever feel for you like i do now? Will you remember me while your gone? Should i tell
you how i feel or wait years to pass? Is it sacrifice? I dont want you to leave. If you leave i
dont know what will happen...
I dont know...
if i will know you...
or me...

what i see in...my manong...
MANONG....

how many times in a day do i say this word maybe about 50? haha...its just because he is my bus driver and i talk to him once in a while..."manong pabuhat ng bag!", "manong ang bigat ng bag ko!", "manong aalis na ba tayo?, "manong punta tayo dyan ha", These are few of the many things i tell/ask him...My manong is a thin man, seemingly tall, thisclose to being bald and a toothy smile...yes he is my manong...and he is one of the most amazing people on earth...

Why? well because he is cool...no as in COOL...as in literally...no not the temperature one...im talking about his brain...my manong after all the commands, complaints,whining of all the children in the bus is able to keep the last remnants of his hair there...haha...he is so unbelievably calm and collected...he would never ever need a therapist...he just seems to smile even though all the problems are there...for example...our tin box of a bus falling apart, the gas price hike, the BUS GETTING AN ACCIDENT...yes...he is able to smile...normally in his state i would have less hair then he has...i would go crazy...as in screaming crazy...he is just a COOL person and he is my manong...:)

ehem...
as i listen to this old singer singing "Light my Fire"...i feel quite sad for myself...i dunno why... ever had a day when you felt bad and sour for no good reason at all...well maybe i have a reason to be mad ...my classmates were like that today...In pinoi terms its called badtrip...i think wednesdays suck now...i have had mood swings eversince the second i woke up...dratted teenager-ed ness...hormones suck...sometimes you just dont like what is created by God...just sometimes...damn i am this rotten...

maybe i feel so sad for many reasons...for a friend who like cusses every two seconds which she didnt do before...for a friend whom ive chatted with for a long time everyday and i thought we might have a recall of our old friendship that was not even there before...for having a crush on two guys whom are very close to my heart...for being so sad...for being so mad...for being so emotional...for reaching the ending of a good book...for not being myself...for not being as close to God as before...for not being a good kid...for being mad for the wrong reasons...for wanting to cry but cant...

I guess i have enough reason to be after all...

INTRAMS!!!
haha...
i ultimately vowed to only blog about emotions and feelings but this experience i have to write...

I WENT TO TFCA AGAIN FOR INTRAMS!!!! WAHOOO!!!!
yes i missed a day of class...(note: i asked my parents) but we wont do anything in class so i went to TFCA...
i came yesterday since it was cheering...the most awaited in INTRAMS...
i woke up at lke 5 am and left at 6.30 hehe...
It was so fun! all the years were very good...
I was watching from the front and it was really good...
The first years did something with sticks and their uniform was cool...
The second years did something with blindfoldsand a human bicycle...
The 3rd years did their signature circular move again...
The 4th years did their new and wonderful person-toss stunt...
They were all good!
Results: The First yrs were in fourth place...
The 3rd Years in third place....
Guess what?

They were tie! the fourth years and the second years!!!
This one judge who looked like a professional dancer said that the second year and the fourth years should have a show-down...haha!!! it was like a Wade-Robson project type of contest...
For the second years they got Missy, Jona and this new guy....for the fourth years they got Chico, Melai, and Allan...haha the judge did the moves and they had to do copy the moves...
I was filming this and it was so cool... They made them do it 3 times and the cheering again! and guess what it was still tie...I think they just should've made them not tie.... For the fourth years it felt like an insult... A major one... because its their last year and they have won every cheering since 1st or 2nd year...*sigh* i feel for them...

After that i was so drained....i sat with Jake and met up with some friends...I spent time with Ramzie and Portia, talked to Yuna, saw Matotsky and Laurence...
Jake is crazy man!!! Talked to mikko and abshi!! haha...I saw Pia and sarah!!! shane is still mad at me for whatever haha...did martial artsand got bruises from aj...it was so fun!! I miss TFCA!!!

Yup..i do....

hmm....hopefully next year...i just miss the guys...:)

It was so funny becuase all the people had bruises on their shoulders, legs, back, arms, and all of them were so tired because it was their last day of INTRAMS...dont worry guys i can tell you one thing...you were all very good ....haha....:)

my story...
She was of a simple nature, the little girl with long, black hair, black eyes and the palest skin. She wore nothing but a pale blue dress which fluttered with the wind.

This girl walks the Path. All day and all night. She has no idea of what lies ahead of her but she does know what the past has been like. You see, this girl has many hurts and bruises, and felt ugly from all the wounds from the past. In her Path were many people passing by. Some were kind and some were friendly but others would stare at her and she was ashamed, she felt their glares and she felt lonely inside. Even through all this, oh how she wished she was like them. They looked so perfect. So beautiful while her scratches were visible for all to see.

But she continued her path which was not always smooth for there were times when they were hard and rough, times when they were steep, and times when they would go in loops and tunnels.

Like every other person, once in a while she felt tired especially when the Path was jagged and cut the soles of her feet. At times the pain felt too great she would start to cry.

One day out of the blue someone came to her path. At that time she felt sad, like there was a black hole in her heart. She felt ugly and sick and oh how lonely she felt. For once in her life she stopped walking the path and sat down and tears ran down her face.

A stranger walked by and saw the Little girl. He saw that she stopped walking. Nobody stops walking when they are on the Path. The girl looked up and saw the stranger’s face, it was mixed with a strange kind of care that the girl never knew before. The stranger looked at her for some time and understood. The stranger hugged her, but even though he was unknown, she felt kindness, joy, peace in her heart. Deep down inside she knew she was loved by this person hugging her. She poured out her soul and tears to the world. And the world listened. The stranger whispered, “No more scars”, spread his wings and flew away.

-its the story i made.

Listen carefully and you can feel the flutter of their wings.

funny...
my life was saved today by a guy who is wearing a crown...

no i didnt have a car crash or drown...

no the guy is not Jesus Christ but he has Jesus in him....

he might get mad at me if i tell his name but trust me he helped me....

man was i depressed today...i really miss TFCA because of all the care and emotion eh...

and when i was depressed i talked to him...he gave me a verse which says:

In God whose Word I Praise,
in God I Trust, I will not be afraid
What can mortal man do to me?
(Psalm 56:4)

dude....if your reading this trust me you saved my life....

thanks a lot...it gave me hope....it gave me life...it made me cry...i miss you guys but i trust you...

I trust you that the Lord will have a plan for me...

It came from a guy with a crown...

I never suspected it would come from him...

but he saved my life today....

sunday morning...
Our band in church is so cool. we practiced from 3-7 pm and it was so fun.
At first it was kind of boring because we weren’t doing anything but tuning for the first 2 hours. But in the end we started and it was fun.The guys were dancing around crazily. Hehe. our band is cool. today was our performance. we prayed before the performance and in it we said that if possible they would see God in us not us on stage. it was fun!!! The crowd was awesome! They really were alive today :) Thank you Lord! Its so sad that Tippy wasn’t there because she has DENGUE!!! AHHHH!!! I feel for her. She doesn’t deserve it. I hope that she gets better! I love you Tippy!

My cousin gave a testimonial today about his realizations in France and here when he was on a mission trip. He said that it doesn’t matter if your in France. It matters that your willing to share the gospel anywhere in the world. I think that that’s important. I’m sad for pastors from the Philippines who go to the US to be missionaries. But I think the Philippines needs them more. I really don’t understand how they can abandon their own country which is now a spiritual wasteland. HAAAY!!!

I made a new friend. I’ sorry but its really a big deal for me. I’m a social person, I love having new friends. His name is Josh from Faith Academy. A friend of my cousin. Its amazing that all of my cousins friends are quiet and my cousin is the noisiest one EVER! Haha. But when it comes to Daniel, his friends are CRAZY! Literally. :) Its funny when Josh and my cousin Ian talks. They talk about games all the time and I’m here staring into the abyss. Haha. Boytalk as I call it. I love my friends. Haha.

Can you keep a secret? I have a new CRUSH! Look DOWN!

His name is Cillian Murphy. You might also know him as "scarecrow" IN Batman Begins... :)